I get the weirdest feeling when it rains. a depressed, yet comfortable feeling. what can I do to make my future a happier future? how, and to what extent can I solve these countless problems in order to make me and my family’s lives better? I can’t help but think of such senseless things. after standing in the rain for ten minutes, I finally somewhat get a hold of myself. my physical age is nineteen. but I’m so old.